Mom101 wrote a post on April 16 about Barbie Confessions (I can't seem to link to the actual post). I thought about how I didn't want my daughter playing with Barbie's either. ( I wrongly assumed with my infant daughter that I would have some say in the matter.) I think I was really disillusioned as a child by the whole Cinderella myth. I mean I really did keep waiting for my Prince in college. He finally did come around but not til I was 23. But I digress.
I grew up a tomboy. I have an older brother but I don't think that he is entirely to blame. I grew up in the country in a rural area. I proudly wore my brother's hand-me-downs until I was old enough to know better. I climbed trees and played a lot in the woods. I was a Girl Scout. I wore jeans everywhere but to church. I was a tomboy. When other girls started carrying purses and wearing lipstick in 5th grade I was like, "Why?" I still wear jeans most of the places I go. I carry a small pocketbook. I wear sneaker's everywhere too. See this post for more details.
So imagine my surprise when instead of another tomboy I beget a "girlie girl". Sometimes I don't know what to do with her. I think though that it must skip a generation. My mother paints B's nails because I don't own any nail polish. B loves dresses. She loves to shop. I remember when we were looking for a Halloween costume a few years ago she asked if she could have new shoes to go along with it.
I had some pretty naive ideas about the differences in the sexes and how much of their environment influences a child's personality. I wanted my children to be intellectuals. To grow up believing women could do anything and men could, too. My son started to play with cars at age 2 and I believe it is still (at age 8) one of his favorites. My daughter loves dolls, and dress-up, and barbies, and Lord Please Forgive me - Princesses. All this despite any environmental influences I tried to make.
But I hope that instead of finding out that the dream of Cinderella is just a dream and being somehow negatively influenced by the body image of Barbie, my daughter will take away other lessons. I hope she will see that her mother is a strong independent woman who balances career and family. I hope my son will see how much his father respects and loves his wife and how much he contributes to raising a family.
And so if my daughter wants to grow up and be a stay-at-home mother like her grandmother I think I can accept that. (Of course she will still be required to complete her degree first.) Just as long as she doesn't want to grow up and be a princess.